My Girlfriend Didn’t Come Home Last Night (Reasons & What to Do)

This article will help you deal with the panic-inducing situation. Your girlfriend did not come home last night, and it is quite normal for you to be anxious. In this article, I will help you with possible reasons why she did not come home last night. I will also mention a few ways to deal with the situation. Read on.

Reasons why your girlfriend did not come home last night

1. She is in danger: Your girlfriend did not come home last night probably because she is in danger. This is the foremost thought that comes to the mind when a loved one does not come home by the time, they said they will reach home.
   • Your girlfriend could be in danger. She did not come home last night because something bad happened to her or to the people she was with. In situations like this, thoughts about the worst possibility infest the mind.
   • She could have been in an accident. Thoughts about life-threatening things like this can bring a lot of stress to the person waiting at home. However, in extremely serious cases the police often contact the victim’s kin as soon as possible.
   • In a world where sex crimes are growing at an alarming rate, a woman not coming home at night (unannounced) is a matter of grave concern. Sexual assault can befall any person (especially women). It is totally uncalled for but unfortunately, it still happens worldwide ─ every hour, every day.
   • She might not be able to contact you or any other person if she loses her phone on the go. That is a different kind of danger. In a world obscenely dependent on gadgets, losing a phone can bring a lot of distress to the owner. It almost feels like our world is crumbling down. Most of us have been in that situation. We have an emotional attachment to our phones. A lost phone brings with it the hassle of informing the police and contacting the service provider to block the sim card. She must have been busy with all these formalities.
   • Someone close to her might be in a problem and that counts as a danger if the problem is serious. What counts as serious? One of her parents could be sick. She did not come home because she had to take them to the emergency room. She might get busy if one of her close friends calls her up for help. She was probably running around the town all night to help her ailing friend. There is a plethora of other things that can be termed as a danger.

2. She was busy with work: Your girlfriend did not come home last night because she was busy at work. Her job demands a lot of hard work and attention.
   • She might skip coming home if her job makes her stay late at the workplace. She probably has a lot going on at work and that is why she could not come home last night. She decided to stay at the office for the night for safety issues.
   • She probably decided to crash at her office for the night so that you do not get disturbed by ringing doorbells and phone calls late at night. If the workload is too much, forgetting to inform you is normal.
   • Certain jobs require employees to work twice as hard as other jobs. She does what she does to enhance her career and earn money (just like everyone else). She is too stressed out to deal with social protocols.

3. She is mad at you: She did not come home last night because she is mad at you. She could be mad because of something you have done. This could also be because of a silly misunderstanding.
   • She does not want to see you right now. She is mad at you and for that, she decided not to come home last night. She wants to teach you a lesson in her absence. You must have done something to make her this mad. She expects you to own up to what you did.
   • In situations like this there are a few places she could be in. She may crash at her parents’ house or she may have stayed the night on a friend’s couch. She just wants to stay away from you until you realize your mistake and apologize to her for that.
   • She is mad at you but that does not mean she is no longer in love with you. She retains the same feelings for you. This is probably a minor tiff (a lover’s spat to be more precise). An honest apology will bring her back to you.

4. She is at her parent’s house: She is at her parents’ house. She felt like visiting her parents. That is why she did not come home last night. She is safe. However, she forgot to inform you about where she is.
   • People get homesick. That is quite normal. Your girlfriend probably got homesick and visited her parents’ place. Parents often do not waste an opportunity to pamper their children. Therefore, she stayed the night in her childhood room.
   • She should have called you but that never happened. She must have forgotten. Catching up with parents after a long time involves a lot of drama. Too much drama can make people forget important things.
   • She can’t be safer. She is at her parents’ house ─ probably the safest place for her on this planet. Once she remembers she will probably call you up to apologize.
   • She expects you to forgive her this time for plunging you into an unnecessarily stressful situation. Your concern for her (mixed with the anger for her irresponsible behavior) is justified.

5. She crashed at a friend’s place: It was too late for her to return home. That is why she decided to crash at a friend’s place.
   • In this scenario too she forgot to inform you about where she is. That is how she involuntarily made the night immensely stressful for you.
   • Wherever she was, it was too late for her to return home. She probably did not have a ride that could bring her home so she decided to stay at a friend’s place close to the venue.
   • There is nothing wrong with it except the fact that she did not inform you and made you wait throughout the night. That was extremely irresponsible of her. She deserves to be called out for that.

6. She wants to break up with you: She did not come home last night because she wants to avoid meeting you at any cost. She probably wants to break up with you.
   • In this scenario, she may or may not be cheating on you. She has just fallen out of love. This happens to people more often than you think. She may not be cheating on you. She just does not like you anymore. Your presence does not make her feel happy. This relationship has reached a dead end. It makes her feel trapped and suffocated. However, that does not mean you are the problem.
   • This could be about her and her commitment issues. She knows how great you are, yet he has to break up with you to put her mind at peace.
   • Just like Robin Scherbatsky from the American sitcom How I Met Your Mother, she is scared of getting too serious in a relationship. The nature of your question here hints at the fact that you guys live together. That is what scares her. She is not ready to settle down right now. Her relationship issues are way more complicated than what appears at the surface level.
   • She did not come home last night because she wants to terminate this relationship with you. She wanted to avoid meeting you in person. She dislikes the unpleasant conversation that comes before a breakup. In simpler words, she wanted to avoid the breakup talk.

7. She is cheating on you: She was with someone else. That is why she did not come home last night. She slept with another person while you were worried sick about her safety. She is cheating on you.
   • She does not care about your feelings. That is why she did not bother to call you to let you know she won’t be coming home at night. She was sleeping with someone else behind your back.
   • She probably is going to break up with you soon. She is looking for the right opportunity to pitch the idea of not staying together anymore.
   • However, she could also cheat on you without the wish to break up with you. This could happen if she feels you are being unable to satisfy her sexually. She still loves you but needs someone else to fulfill her carnal desires. This is a weird relationship with too much baggage to deal with.

8. She had an emergency to attend to: Not coming home at night is quite normal for a person who works in emergency services. Her job demands her to be present to attend emergencies at the odd hours of the night.
   • People working in emergency services are often required to provide their service at odd hours. She did not come home last night because she was busy helping someone.
   • This could happen if she is a doctor or a nurse working in a hospital. Hospitals have stressful environments where an employee often have to be on their foot to serve people in emergencies.
   • She may not come home at night if she is a law enforcement officer. People in this profession, too, have to tend to myriad emergencies every day. She did come home probably because she was protecting the law of the land with her colleagues.
   • People working in social services too often have to stay out late. They directly work with the people of our society and tend to needs that are complicated to deal with.

What to do when your girlfriend did not come home last night?

1. Check if she is in danger: You should check if she is in danger. There are several ways to do that without looking like a person who does not trust their girlfriend.
   • Check if she has sent you a text or a voice message. Is there a call that you have missed from her or any of her friends? If yes, you need to address the issue fast.
   • The quicker you act the better. Your swift action can save your girlfriend from imminent danger. Use your common sense to make a list of places she could be in or people she could be with. Turn into a detective for a few hours if you have to.
   • However, you have to trust your girlfriend in situations like this. Try not to blame her for things she has never done. Try not to assume she is up to something dubious. Give her the benefit of the doubt and start looking for her.
   • You will have to control your anger. An initial bout of angry thoughts is common when a loved one does not come home within the usual time. However, uncontrolled anger often impairs one’s senses and makes one do regrettable things. Do not do something you might regret later.

2. Try calling her: You can try calling her to know where she is. You can drop a text if she fails to pick up the call. Before jumping to negative conclusions, you should always try to learn the truth.
   • Call her to know where she is. If she fails to pick up the phone, leave a voice message for her. You can show your concern there. However, do not forget to be polite when you talk to her. She might be in problems that are more serious than your sleepless night.
   • When speaking directly to her over the phone, you can start with questions like, “Are you okay?” or “Why didn’t you come home last night? Is everything all right?” Your voice should be calm but with a hint of concern.
   • You can also drop a text if she does not receive your call. There also, you will have to be polite and sensitive. You do not know what she is going through. She will probably not be willing to deal with your issues right now. You can even offer to help.

3. Visit the place she was in last night: If you know where she was last night, visit the place to learn where she could be right now. Someone must know.
   • Do you know where she was last night? If yes, visit the venue to get a clue about where she is. This particular way to deal with the situation is only applicable when she is not receiving your calls, not replying to your texts, or her phone is switched off.
   • Visit the place she was in first thing in the morning and talk to people who might have seen her. Show them her photo and ask if they have seen her anywhere. Ask them if they have seen her leave the venue.
   • If they confirm seeing her at the venue, ask them when was the last time they saw her or when did she leave and with whom. This information will help you if (unfortunately) you find out that she is actually missing.

4. Talk to her friends: Her friends might know where she is. Tell them she did not come home last night and that you are concerned about her safety.
   • This solution works in a few scenarios. Her friends might know if she is mad at you or if she stayed the night at someone’s place. If they are good people, they can even let you know if she is cheating on you.
   • Her friends have a network. They know each other. Therefore, they will know if she crashed at someone’s place for the night. You will just have to allow them some time to call each other and confirm.
   • If you ask politely, they will let you know if she is mad at you. They know everything about her. They are the only people she can go to when she gets mad at you. Her friends might even help you to win her heart again. However, they might chide you a bit for making their friend mad.
   • If she is cheating on you, she has a secret. She must have shared it with some of her friends. To be honest, it will not be easy for you to extract information from them about where she was last night. You can try contacting common friends. Information like this (even secrets) spread like wildfire among friends. Remember the time in F.R.I.E.N.D.S when Ross wanted to hide that he cheated on Rachel by running from person to person in a network of friends to break the chain of passing information? Rachel eventually got to know. Information is available inside her group of friends. You just need to find the right person.

5. Say that you are sorry: She did not come home last night because she was mad at you. In that case, you need to apologize soon before things go wrong.
   • The best way to bring her back home is to say you are sorry. Apologize for what you have done even if you think you are right. Set aside your ego if you want to be in this relationship.
   • She did not come home last night because she is mad at you. Do not mess with her further in a situation like this. Try to own up to what you did.
   • Minor fights like this often escalate into a larger problem and turns the relationship toxic. She must have taken offense about something you have said or done. Right now, you have to focus on bringing her back. You can talk about right and wrong later (when she has calmed down).

6. Go to the police if you suspect foul play: If you are convinced that she is in danger, go to the police for help. Do it as soon as you can.
   • Your girlfriend did not come home last night. If she is still missing (even after you looked for her) you need to contact the police as soon as possible. That will attempt to ensure her safety.
   • She can go missing for several reasons. A civilian like you can only gather limited information. The police will be able to help you in finding her.
   • They might be able to save her in time if she is in danger. Tracking someone’s footsteps is a difficult task. It can only be done efficiently by the police.

7. Check if she is cheating on you: You need to check if she is cheating on you. She did not come home last night. If she does not have a believable explanation, check for more such signs to prove her infidelity.
   • You need to be sure of the fact that she is cheating on you if you want to confront her. A mere hunch will not work. You need concrete proof to prove that she has been disloyal. Otherwise, she might call you out as a toxic person with major trust issues.
   • You can check her phone when she is not around or you can follow her for a bit when she goes out at an odd hour. You can check for unusual fragrances on her clothes. You need to be discreet in these scenarios. If she catches you spying on her, she will call you a creep and probably will get the moral high ground. Here are a few more ways to check if your girlfriend is being disloyal.
   • You need to be extra careful as the person we are discussing is your girlfriend. What if your suspicion is wrong? How will you face her after wrongly accusing her of cheating on you? These are things to think about. Think before you take a drastic step. Do not say something you might regret later.

8. Inform her parents: If you can’t find her anywhere, inform her parents so that they can take part in the search. They deserve to know.
   • Her parents are the most important people in her life. They should know their daughter is missing. They have the right to take part in the search.
   • However, you might face hostility when you break the news to them. They will get angry at you at first but that is normal because they have just learned their daughter is missing.
   • Be kind to them and tend to their needs during this time of crisis. They should understand that you love their daughter as much as they do and that you are also concerned about her safety.
   • Inform her parents that she did not come home last night. But remember not to scare them. They should not get stressed as that might affect their physical and mental health.

9. Do not make her feel bad about performing her professional duties: Her job demands her to stay out late at night. If that is the case do not make her feel bad for doing her job right. She probably loves her job and chiding her about it might paint you in the wrong light.
   • She can’t change her profession because you feel anxious whenever she is out late or skips coming home for the night. She has so many reasons to stay out if she works in emergency services.
   • Even if she is not involved in emergency services, she can work late at night. She probably has a lot of work pressure. Coming home will distract her. That is why she has chosen to stay at the workplace. You can’t fight with her for doing her job.
   • Be supportive if you truly care for her. She needs you to be by her side, not against her. If she forgets to call you, you can call her to know if she will be coming home. You can welcome her with a hot beverage, a home-cooked meal, and a fragrant bath whenever she comes home. That way, she will treat you the same when you are stressed out.

Tips

A few things to remember:

• She could be in danger. If you suspect foul play, act on it as swiftly as possible. Try to contact the police and inform her parents.
• Your girlfriend did not come home last night. It is a legit matter of concern. But you should try to stay calm. Do not panic as that might impair your reasoning ability in a situation of crisis like this.
• Gather proof and confront her if you suspect her of cheating on you. Things are not working out between you two and that is why she stayed out all night just to avoid the awkward confrontation with you.
• She might want to break up with you even though she is not cheating on you. Things are not working out between you two and that is why she stayed out all night just to avoid the awkward confrontation with you.
• You can call her friends and family to ask where she is. However, that always carries the risk of sending them into a panic mode if they have no clue about their daughter’s whereabouts.
• If her job needs her to stay out at night she will not come back home at times. If you want to be with her learn to accept it. She will not throw away her career for your convenience. If you continue with this behavior, she might want to end this relationship with you.